Abuse in its various forms must be exposed because most people are being victimized and don’t even know it. This article is not for women and young people, but everyone.

Abuse in its various forms must be exposed because most people are being victimized and don’t even know it. This article is not for women and youth, but everyone. No matter the age, young or old, abuse is happening.

The fuel behind the hatred of men within the feminist movement is rooted in the abuse of women. Men remain silent as they experience abuse at the hands of their wives or girlfriends.

The mainstream Christian Church, some Hebrew Israelite groups, and other false religions have become places of assault.

Saints of God are persecuted for their faith, and black people across the world are abused through the system of racism.

This article will teach you how to identify abuse because the enemy has tricked many into thinking what they’re experiencing is not abuse, and that it’s something they have to accept. No. You must not, and should not accept every form of abuse.

We’ll also expose the lies that keep people within abusive relationships or environments, and of course, how to heal from abuse, and live in freedom.

Abuse is important to understand because it’s a tool of the enemy that, if allowed to continue unnecessarily, will pervert your mind, stunt your growth, and ultimately destroy your soul.

Photo by Sydney Sims on Unsplash

Defining abuse

I place abuse in two categories: physical and spiritual. Most of us know what physical abuse looks like and we’ll talk about that later, but spiritual abuse is what many people miss.

Spiritual abuse is anything that isn’t physical. Verbal abuse—harmful comments or remarks aimed at someone—falls under this category. If not words, body language and actions.

And then there’s another form of abuse that is demonic. That’s when there’s no one physically communicating to you, yet you have thoughts that condemn you, belittle you, torment you, and pound at your soul—this is demonic abuse.

The dictionary defines abuse in three varieties. I’m going to go through each and expose how abuse is found in everyday life on a regular basis. This is not something isolated to Catholic boys or wives with tyrannic husbands—no—everyone has experienced abuse at least once, and most people experience it on a daily basis.

Abuse definition #1

a·buse 1: Use (something/someone) to a bad effect or for a bad purpose; misuse. Use or treat in such a way as to cause damage or harm. Synonyms: misuse, misapply, misemploy.

Fornication

Unmarried men and women having sex is a form of abuse, even if it’s consensual because they are using a gift exclusively designated for married people. Going a step further, Paul, in the book of Romans 1:27 and 1 Corinthians 6:9, calls the acts of homosexuals “abuse,” and this isn’t that hard to understand.

A man ramming his ding-dong in another man’s rear is abusive. Aside from the damage done to the rectum, the male member was not made to be placed in the mouth either. Even when married heterosexuals engage in these very same activities, they’re abusing one another. Abuse is simply the misuse of something or someone—taking what was made for one purpose and using it for another.

Job misplacement

Who would’ve thought being employed could be a form of abuse—that is if you were misplaced inside a company. Misplacement is possessing gifts and talents, but not being able to use those in the position they said they hired you for.

You were told they needed X, Y and Z, and that you fit that, but when you got to working, they assigned you tasks A, B and C. You were excited about using your talents only to be relegated to maintenance and mundane tasks. While this is frustrating, it’s abuse at the hands of your employer because they’re misusing you—you don’t fit the job.

Employers do this for a number of reasons, but it’s a form of abuse and if one tolerates it for the sake of money, they’re allowing their soul to be damaged in the long run.

Just like a square cube trying to fit into a round slot, so much so that talented person whose being tasked with things he/she didn’t signup for—it doesn’t work. Either the square is going to have to break, or the circle. Usually the square will have its corners shattered to fit into that round slot.

Most employment

A broader look at the landscape of American careers and I can see a slave plantation—abuse, once again. Was mankind put on this earth to work 40 or more hours a week just to maintain the wealth of men they’re not even related to? My problem with it is the average worker has no substantial equity or ownership of his own. Is this good honest labor or slavery?

One of the definitions of slavery is this: a person who works very hard without proper remuneration or appreciation. Most employees would agree they’re not appreciated or compensated for the long hours they put in.

Another definition of slavery is: a person who is excessively dependent upon or controlled by something. Some employees make just enough to sustain their living space just so they can return to work the next day. They live to work, and work to live. Is that right?

If they stop working they’ll soon have no place to live, no food, and no personal transportation without getting another job. They are dependent on jobs. Now, let’s look at those wealthy business men they’re working for. How long can they last without working? Usually decades because they’ve created a system that grows and maintains itself at the expense, and on the backs of employees slaves.

Humanity was not placed on this earth to maintain and grow a small minority’s wealth.

Therefore I view most employment as a subtle form of slavery, which is abuse. Apart from how badly workers are treated, humanity was not placed on this earth to maintain and grow a small minority’s profit margins at the expense of their health and freedom.

Mankind’s purpose is a to glorify God and advance his kingdom, not man’s.

Abuse definition #2

a·buse 2: Treat (a person or an animal) with cruelty or violence, especially regularly or repeatedly. Synonyms: mistreat, maltreat, ill-treat, treat badly; assault (someone, especially a woman or child) sexually. Antonyms: look after, nurture.

This definition is what most of us know abuse to be. Abuse, while it can be a one time thing, is often repeated. It’s the repeated misuse of a person. For example: a woman is not punching bag to express one’s anger, and children are not sexual toys. The word cruelty is rightfully included in the definition which means:

Callous indifference to, or pleasure in causing pain and suffering. Behavior that causes pain or suffering to a person or animal. Behavior that causes physical or mental harm to another, especially a spouse, whether intentionally or not.

If you’re experiencing pain and suffering due to the actions of another and they’re continuing to treat you this way, you are being abused. It could be by the local police, store staff, local neighbors, your pastor, husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, co-worker, boss, teacher, mother, father, or sibling—it’s abuse.

A husband slaps, punches, or violently throws his wife against a wall in anger. A wife or girlfriend sharply elbows her man for looking at another woman. A girlfriend punches, kicks, scratches, or pours boiling water on her boyfriend severely injuring him. Apart from the reasons behind these behaviors, it’s still abuse.

Most men just accept mistreatment from their wives or girlfriends, never talking about it, because they’re supposed to be invulnerable, but they’re not. A woman, while not as strong as a man, can still injure a man and so it’s still considered abuse.

Whole communities are abused on a weekly basis as racist cops come into black neighborhoods, harass, beat, accuse and often kill citizens because of the color of their skin. While this is called racism, it’s also called abuse.

Abuse definition #3

a·buse 3: Speak in an insulting and offensive way to or about (someone). Synonyms: insult, be rude to, swear at, curse, call someone names, taunt, shout at, revile, inveigh against, bawl out, vilify, slander, cast aspersions on; insults, curses, jibes, expletives, swear words; mistreatment, maltreatment, ill-treatment. Antonyms: compliment, flatter.

This is often the definition people overlook and don’t consider. Some spouses will never lift a hand, but their words are destructive. If it isn’t sarcastic remarks when one makes a mistake, it’s direct statements that belittle, insult, vilify and destroy one’s confidence and nature abilities over time.

Couple arguing. Wife shouting to her desperate husband sitting on a couch in the living room at home

From physical bullies at school to online “cyber bullying,” if people disagree with something you said, you could become an abuse victim. We’ve all seen it online: angry tweets and vicious Facebook and YouTube comments; and then some youngster tragically commits suicide because of it. I’ve had my fair share of abuse through email as people disagree with the articles on this site.

There’s an erroneous saying that goes, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” That’s a total lie! Frankly, words are more effective at hurting someone than physical violence. Words are spiritual. Once in the soul, they can redirect a person’s whole course in life including deteriorating their physical health.

Words are powerful. Never believe you can’t be negatively affected when tolerating verbal abuse.

If the Word of God can transform us (2 Timothy 3:16-17), so can the destructive words of mankind. Words are powerful. Never think you’re not being negatively effected when tolerating verbal abuse.

Verbal abuse doesn’t have to include, what some consider, vulgarity. Please visit this article later: Can Christians Curse? on the subject of vulgarity and cursing, and you may be surprised at what you find.

Church Abuse

I want to be clear that punishment is not abuse. If someone committed a crime, they must endure the consequences (this is not to say that all punishment is fair). Likewise in the church, rebuke and discipline, in regards to sin is not abuse, but it could be labeled as such if not coupled with love.

Church pastors (who’ve been institutionalized) will often abuse their congregants from the pulpit for challenging their false doctrines. I’ve known about private conversations made public through sermons. While the leader excludes their victim’s name, they verbally destroy a member as they sit there surprised and defenseless. The spectators often know that’s what going on, but only the person involved in the private conversation is hit with the full force of his wrath.

Rebuking the pastor for his abusive retaliation would only bring more drama and more abuse from loyalist of the pastor—so the person usually walks away ashamed and hurt.

Church members are being abused every Sunday as they’re bullied into giving a tenth of their income, a love offering, and a donation to the never ending “building fund.” The scriptures are twisted to manipulate the members to support the “ministry.”

They’ve been told that God will send the “devourer” to consume their finances if they don’t “pay”, and members are shamed and treated as being stingy for not dropping money in the collection plate. This is abuse.

Aside from manipulating and robbing people ever Sunday, church members are told that if they leave the fellowship, or even visit other ministries, God’s going to curse them.

Abuse reveals itself through neglect when elder widows or poor members struggle financially, but the pastor is living large. Another form of neglect is when a pastor fails to disciple new converts. Real shepherds take care of the babes, hirelings could care less (John 10:12).

On top of becoming a new member, the babe in Christ is forced to work to support the church even if they’re not yet capable or ready to do so. Often times they’re misemployed as we discussed earlier.

Leaders abuse their sheep by making them maintain 2 or 3 services every Sunday on top of other duties throughout the week. Voicing one’s concerns for being overworked is only met with shaming and guilt-tripping.

Similarly, the mainstream Church is like that corporation mentioned earlier, but often tragically occupied with non-paid employees. So we have slaves to corporations and now slaves to local churches—double bondage!

Add to the mix a community of toxic people who’ve never been born again, having never healed from their own wounds, and you’ve got an environment saturated with abuse.

Subtle racism

The events of “Bloody Sunday” (a peaceful protest initiated by the SNCC ending in injury and death) televised the mistreatment of black people under the system of racism to the entire world. From that point on, that kind of expression was vilified, but that didn’t stop the system.

Today, while a black man or woman won’t be called a nigger and physically hurt openly, they are still disrespected. In some places of employment they’re just not treated as an equal or valued as a team player. Instead, they’re allowed a position on the basis of remaining the “token negro” or, to do the “nigger work.”

They’re purposely misplaced and find themselves in positions that don’t allow them to express their full talents and gifts. They’re overworked and underpaid. They’re passed up for promotions. They’re often given a bunch of weak excuses as to why this is happening to them.

This is abuse. It puts the unsuspecting black person on a hamster wheel because those in power never intend for them to get anywhere; and it destroys self-confidence.

Cashing your hard-earned check and patronizing your favorite store only to be followed around and treated like a criminal is another form of abuse. While those staff members never said anything disrespectful, their body language did. Even though you’re paying monetarily for items you need, your soul is also being debited from the abuse.

Leaving the store, you’re often stopped and questioned by the local authorities—this also is a form of abuse. No wonder black people feel a sense of guilt even though they’re innocent when pulled over by the cops. We live in an abusive, racist environment that projects criminality on to us even when we’re innocent.

In this video, a man was trying to enjoy a barbecue with his family while his white neighbor across the way spied on him with binoculars. When he went to confront her about it, she yelled out rape (and it’s all caught on camera). Apart from even saying a word, this kind of treatment is abusive.

Demonic abuse

After getting away from abusive environments and toxic people you can still experience negative internal thoughts. You must understand that these are coming from evil spirits.

In most cases, the verbal abuse you experienced from certain people was really coming from the spirits within them and they were just being used as hosts.

Breaking free from a Jezebel spirit and all the turmoil that comes with the disconnection will usually leave some lingering thoughts that you have to be cast down (2 Corinthians 10:5).

But even after you’re free from toxic people, you can begin to get thoughts either at night via dreams, or during the day out of the blue. This is the enemy taking a stab at you directly because he can’t use that person anymore to do it.

Take these as signs that you’re on the brink of a breakthrough, which is a good thing, or you’ve unknowingly given them access through sin, which is a bad thing. I briefly talk about casting out spirits in regards to guilt thoughts and lust, but the principles are always the same. Take the authority you’ve been given and command them to go (Luke 10:19).


Overall, abuse is a misuse of another person. Every human on this earth is supposed to be loved and allowed to fulfill the purpose they were ordained for by God. Now, because of sin, the world lacks the nature of God, who is, the very essence of love (1 John 4:8).

Contrary to the world, the true saints have God’s love and don’t practice abusive behavior. This is another reason why I joined the kingdom of God.

7 Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. 8 He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love. (1 John 4:7-8)

Because the world don’t understand love or how anyone is to be treated, they abuse instead. If someone isn’t patient with you, or kind, or respectful, or honest, or trusting or supportive or anything else listed in the attributes of Godly Love (1 Cor 13:4-7), their repeated behavior can be considered abuse. Thankfully, God sent his son so that those who follow him may have the power to love and not abuse.

This is the end for now. Stay subscribed for the next part. We’ve identified what abuse is and what it’s not. Next, we’ll uncover why people accept mistreatment, how to get free from abusive people; proper healing as opposed to improper healing, and how to protect your soul from future harm.

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